My Abundance Journey

Sometime in the early 1990’s my friend Gladys Murphy recommended a book to me: The Prospering Power of Love, by Catherine Ponder.  Reading this beautiful little book is where my Abundance Journey began.  At that time prosperity or abundance “consciousness” was so far outside the way I perceived the world that when it was first explained to me I’m sure I rolled my eyes and said “yeah right!”  I’d never uttered an affirmation, never believed that I could ask and not only be “listened to” but answered.  Occasionally I felt quite alone and bereft.  I believed that the Divine or Source was separate from me.  Separate from me just as I was separate from all others.  The paradigm of a holographic universe was beyond me; my view was that we were all of us, alone, isolated, and that our little blue and green planet was simply a rock floating in the middle of the sky.  Before I began my journey I believed that Divine Source couldn’t possibly be right there for me and with me, couldn’t possibly supply abundance, plentitude, or “an overflowing fullness of many blessings.”  And belief, as we know is a powerful thing.

My journey continued.  What I believed to be true evolved and abundance slowly crept into my world.  I spent the rest of the 1990’s “working the problem” of feeling deserving, of wrapping my head around the idea that there’s limitless supply and my “having” doesn’t mean someone else “has not.”   Each year I made more money than I had the year before, which certainly felt good, but still there was an underlying tension because deep down I believed that it could all so easily fall away.  As often as I said affirmations and manifested a higher salary, a nicer apartment, and a car I couldn’t stop to be grateful or even pleased about these gifts showing up in my life.  I didn’t know about the “Integration Process for Completions” and I simply continued to speed forward afraid that if I stopped I’d crash, I’d sink into despair, I’d loose my forward momentum and all would be lost.

In May of 1999 a giant step on my journey occurred when I dragged Gladys and another friend to a free demonstration of something called Holographic Repatterning®.  The wonderful Kenya de Rosa hosted the evening and for Gladys and me it was a life changer.  Gladys immediately began taking classes in “Holographic Repatterning,” and both of us joined a weekly group repatterning series that Kenya offered.  For three and a half years Kenya hosted this group for creative artists working to clear away the blockages that kept each of us from achieving all that we desired for our creative selves and lives.  There were lots of different non-coherent beliefs, earlier experiences and issues blocking our ways, but one theme that rose up for us again and again was a lack of abundance–of time, of confidence, and certainly of money.

After a couple of years of showing up weekly and seeing “what was up” for the group that week, Kenya arrived one Monday evening with a book called The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity by–you guessed it–Catherine Ponder.  It had been perhaps ten years since I’d read The Prospering Power of Love, and though I’d bought other books of Catherine’s such as The Dynamic Laws of Healing I hadn’t gotten this, her first book on prosperity.  Kenya suggested that we might want to work on prosperity and abundance exclusively for a while and we all agreed to get the book and go through it week by week.

The Repatterning practitioners reading this article, who’ve had the training and have the tools, all probably make sure that they resonate with any intention or affirmation that comes to them and hopefully enjoy the abundant blessings that Divine Source so happily supplies.  At the time Kenya’s group started on The Dynamic Laws, being able to literally shift myself ON so I was resonating with an affirmation was a revelation for me.  Having been in Kenya’s group I’d become pretty familiar with not only the idea of “resonating” with something, but how that actually felt in my system.  I could look back on things I’d thought, said or done and know when I was resonating with it and when I was suffering from that push-me-pull-you tension of wanting something with part of me while another less visible part was pulling hard against it.

We’ve heard it said and probably say it ourselves: intention is everything.  According to Dictionary.com – “intention” is defined as: “an act or instance of determining mentally upon some action or result.”  Okay, but what about our mental state when we’re doing the determining?  Only when my system has been shifted ON for a particular affirmation can I feel that I’m physically and mentally pulsing with power and joy while “affirming” it.  This feeling of power and joy is quite different from the feeling of desperation I’d sometimes experienced in the past as I’d endlessly repeated “Divine Love and Divine Wisdom prosper me NOW.”

I originally moved to New York City to study acting and to make my living as an actress.  There are lots and lots of different classes available here designed to help actors find their fire, loosen up their instruments, learn a particular method, become “camera ready” and to radiate “star” quality.  While I was stuck in my earlier beliefs of lack and scarcity, I could never bring myself to spend much money on classes.  I could manage to hand over a weekly rate to a teacher, class by class, but the idea of plunking down hundreds for a seminar or series just froze me.  By the time I’d received some 130 to 150 sessions in Kenya’s group, I felt safe enough to let money flow out and safe enough to trust that it would flow back in.  Interestingly, by this point in my journey, when I was finally able to have a little trust that the abundant universe would supply me with what I needed, I didn’t choose to sign up for an acting seminar; I chose to study Resonance Repatterning® instead.

I signed up to take Fundamentals of Holographic Repatterning in the summer of 2002.  I was nervous but also excited about having Holographic Repatterning as tool and knowing how to use it.  I was delighted that I would soon be able to identify and shift myself ON for new intentions, but also be able to find those problematic beliefs that were keeping some of the icky stuff stuck.   Knowing that I would soon be able to identify this “stuff” and then use a modality to create a shift so I’d be ON for the good–and OFF for the icky stuff–was fantastic.  By the autumn of 2002 I’d taken Fundamentals, Primary Patterns and Transforming Unconscious Patterns.  All the work I was able to now do for myself, as well as the sessions I’d received in the past, helped me get to the point in my journey where I was able to pause and acknowledge when good “stuff” seemed to simply show up in my life.  I was now able to understand physically, emotionally, mentally and in spirit that this is the “overflowing fullness of many blessings” that is the result my being ON for abundance. (Editor’s note:  Holographic Repatterning officially became Resonance Repatterning in May 2006)

I was able to take the basic seminars as well as some of the advanced classes in the next couple of years.  I also had the great good fortune to be in New York City, where the generous and gifted Meryl Chodosh-Weiss teaches Resonance Repatterning, hosts a monthly skills development group, is a designated observer and can certify practitioners.  When the RPA devised the “I Declare” program with the intention of re-categorizing practitioners as “Student,” “Student I Declare,” or “Certified” instead of Level One and Level Two (certified) practitioners, Meryl galvanized our monthly group into action.  Many of us “declared” and set our sights on achieving our certification by the proposed June 2007 deadline.  All of you who are certified practitioners or active “I Declare” students know it takes time and effort to complete the certification process.  It takes people showing up and being willing to work with you and receive sessions so you can get your practice in and master this system.  It takes patience with yourself and a belief that you can do this and are meant to do it.  It takes a sincere belief that the universe will rise up to meet and support you, it takes a belief in abundance; there will be time enough, clients enough, money enough, and determination enough to achieve your goal.  And you better believe we, as group and individually, repatterned and repatterned and repatterned ourselves so we were ON for these abundant beliefs.

I achieved my goal of becoming a certified practitioner of Resonance Repatterning in June of 2007 along with my dear friend and fellow traveler Gladys, but this was certainly not the end of any of my journeys, abundance or otherwise.  From the time I began in Kenya’s group, through my training and certification process I was making my living as an Executive Assistant working in the Financial Services sector here in New York City.  Sometimes I was working for giant companies like Goldman Sachs and others for tiny boutique Investment Banking firms.  I was surrounded by many examples of wealth, both personal and corporate.  I was also surrounded by many individuals who seemed to feel they must continue to speed forward, afraid that if they stopped they’d crash, sink into despair, loose their forward momentum and all would be lost.  On the days when I was most coherent, it was interesting to realize that people making anywhere from three to one hundred times my salary felt less abundant than me.

In 2008 when the economy took its tumble, I joined the millions of unemployed and was granted an opportunity to seize the day, shift my focus and see if I could create a private practice for myself as a practitioner of Resonance Repatterning, along with several other energy modalities I’d begun to study.  I was excited, terrified and a little nauseous when I recalled that, in 2005 during my interview for the job I’d just lost, I’d boldly told my prospective manager that my five-year plan was to have my own private practice as an energy healer by 2010.  As I realized I’d stated this crazy intention out loud, thoughts like “Golly Moses! is that dang universe always listening?” and “This is another fine mess you’ve gotten us into Ollie!” chased their way through my head.

Well, now what?  The abundant universe had just supplied me with the one commodity I’d always found in the shortest supply–TIME.  That may be the scariest thing that’s ever happened to me.  Despite the fact that I’d achieved coherence in many areas of my life, I was still holding onto this bizarre belief that I was like some species of shark–if I stopped swimming I’d die.  And what I most needed to do was take a really big pause, get very very quiet and let myself live in the present moment.  It took me a number of months to work through my relationship with and beliefs about time.  Once I’d made some peace in this area, I was able to be more awake in the present in the moment.  Being more awake in the present moment allowed me to see how Divine Order was playing itself out in my life.  After that, I was able to turn my attention to the task at hand, which I saw as “can I create a private practice for myself and live my life in prosperity, peace and safety?”  Once more the abundant hands of the universe provided me with some amazing assistance.

Just prior to my official termination date from my job, I was put in contact with my wonderful Life Coach Deborah Todd.  Deborah lives in Illinois and is friends with one of my dad’s best friends.  So I found my perfect Life Coach because my father, the plumber, is friends with Deborah’s friend, a master carpenter, and he brought Deborah along one day to deliver a present to my dad.  I got a great gift too!  Deborah and I do an exchange of services and the work we do on both sides has had an enormous and positive effect.  I would not be here today writing this article without her guidance, intelligence, care, support and the gentle but firm pushes that I require from time to time.

I would also not be here today without the amazing support I’ve received from fellow Resonance Repatterning practitioners who embody generosity, intelligence, practicality and community.  In the beginning of 2010 I needed to speak to Liz Tobin about the upcoming Annual Conference and while we were chatting I told her that I was attempting to start my private practice.  She told me that when she began hers someone suggested that she try offering a 100 Days of Prosperity proxy package for $100 – just a dollar a day.  Liz told me she tried it and it worked quite well.  Liz is a master of the proxy group.  I’m currently enrolled in her “Transforming Money Archetypes and Karmic Contracts” proxy group series, its great and if you haven’t checked out her work, I totally recommend it.  I also recommend Beth Polito’s “Lunation” proxy group that works on the lunar cycles.  Being able to receive regular sessions in this manner has had a powerful and profound effect on me, my life and the work I’m able to do.

I officially launched my business in February of 2010 with the arrival of my very own website.  This was one month shy of the five year mark I’d so crazily intended in that long ago job interview.  I’d invested in a MacBook when I lost my job, so I was able to build the site myself using Apple’s iWeb software.  Building the site, and continuing to work on it, has been a surprising joy for me, and engages me on multiple levels.

By April of 2010, I was ready to try out the 100 Days series for myself and got so much out of it.  Once in the groove of doing a proxy session for my group each day I often lost sight of who was the giver and who was receiving.  The energy that the group created to move all of us forward was an honor and a joy to hold.  Doing the series stretched me in wonderful ways and on quite a few occasions I sort of ended up writing our own repatterning from what “was up” in the group.  The series was so well received that I offered a second series in October 2010.  The second series was even more popular and profound than the first and the feedback I’ve received has been tremendous.  A fellow Resonance Repatterning practitioner, who was a member of the group, wrote the following:

“100 days of prosperity–amazing!  A VERY deep healing experience.  While I can honestly say that money flowed more easily into my life, more importantly, areas of my life that were less than functional and coherent were transformed.  During the 100 days, I achieved a comfortable body weight that I have sought for over 3 decades without success. I was able to safely lose 30 lbs. in 7 weeks.   The structure of my financial life shifted.  For example, a gas-guzzling, repair-needing car has been traded in for a fuel-efficient new car that makes the whole family happy.  A computer system to support an additional income source was easily purchased at a very good sale price.  CORE things that affect my entire family’s prosperity shifted.  I recommend anyone who has the chance to do this work!  It is a gift!”

This is a journey and this is life, so there are coherent days and non-coherent days.  There are days when I somehow feel plugged into a giant cosmic engine and other days when I wouldn’t feel grounded if I filled my pockets with rocks and walked barefoot in the grass.  The primary thing I’ve come to understand in my journey thus far is that in working on Abundance we work on the full spectrum of life itself.  Delving down and identifying the blockages we have when it comes to giving and receiving, aligning with our masculine/feminine aspects or feeling safe and deserving touch core patterns that exist across all features of our human landscape.  In working to align with abundance we must chase our every feeling, belief and experience of scarcity, lack or shortage out of the dark and into the light.  We need to be fearless and to be gentle, compassionate and passionate, we need to empower and to allow ourselves to flourish and to thrive.

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Transformative Moments

What a remarkable coincidence that the theme of our issue is “Transformation” and it is our first time to publish in blog format!  Our Repatterning Practitioners Association Journal is continually transforming.  These changes in its form brought us face to face with the question Sally Herr so wisely asked, “Where does the Journal live?”

Our answer?  The Journal lives in the hearts and minds of its readers; us; our community of Resonance Repatterning Practitioners.  And who better to ask about transformation than this community?  And what could be a more fitting area of interest than our very own transformation into Certified Practitioners?

And perhaps best of all, what could be a better way to encourage our community to participate in our new blog journal than to gather input from its members?

So…using the online list of practitioners, I sent an email with three questions to those in the United States that listed a website (there are close to fifty).  I received eight email replies.  I also called the first half of the list and did spontaneous interviews with another seven.  (If I do something like this again, I’ll call the second half of the list, to keep it balanced.)

Connecting with you (the practitioners) has been a delightful and rejuvenating experience for me in so many ways!  I love hearing and sharing what you have to say and I hope you enjoy what your community has to say about their transformation experiences.

1.  “Was there a moment when you knew that you had achieved the skill and confidence needed to be a practitioner?”

Responses that related to certification:

  • “At my final observation, I knew nothing about my client, who arrived in a wheelchair with advanced muscular dystrophy for his first session.  He was unable to use his arm for the muscle check.  I got out of my process and my only concern became his successful experience.  We discovered his fingertips worked for the mc.  I knew then that I had enough skill to be a creative problem solver on my clients’ behalf.  It was a beautiful to be part of his first experience of his energy moving.  And I discovered myself as ‘Presence.’ ”    Patti Towhill
  • “The moment I was certified – it was like going to see the Wizard of Oz.  Even my husband remarked that I was a different woman than the one that walked out the door that morning. I might have had the confidence all along, but the stamp of approval gave me a real boost.”  Elizabeth Tobin
  • “I knew during/just after my last supervision.  I had not passed four supervisions  and was feeling very discouraged.  This client was not a “difficult man”– which was the type of client that in those times were preferred for supervision.  She was a career woman who had just lost her professional license.  The entire session consisted of energy constriction work.  The entire room was riveted.  It was a powerful session and she left smiling.”     Sally Herr
  • “I remember feeling how much fun this process was.  Like each session was a journey of discovery that seemed so easy to me compared to other processes I had done.   Doing sessions with my fellow students every week helped a great deal.”    Bobbie Martin
  • “My first session–when I charged money–felt like a christening.  It was proof that it was something valuable.  Feedback on how helpful it was confirmed to me that I was a practitioner.  There were lots of stellar moments between transforming from student to practitioner, but the defining moment was the money.”  Cynthia Paul
  • “At my observation Ardis said I smoothly facilitated the session and moved skillfully with the client while “holding the healing space” – helping to lead the person to a higher state of coherence.  Later that day I felt major shifts, I felt grounded, happy, confident, and at times exhilarated.”  Ray Iasiello
  • “I distinctly felt a new energy welling through me during my observation. It was a warm honey-like energy, a flowing inner smile of calm and assurance.  This inner aspect still comes forth for sessions, it feels different than my normal self.”  Laura Frisbie

About gaining mastery over time:

  • “I knew when I obtained a flow because I knew the material and also when my clients started sending their loved ones and friends to me for sessions.”  Victoria Benoit
  • “I don’t recall a particular moment.  My confidence increased as I received more and more positive feedback from clients.”   Jennifer Foster

About trusting self and the process:

  • “The defining moments all had one thing in common – learning to trust myself.  I had to trust it always, no matter what, or else I could not possibly do this work.  So I made the decision to trust it consciously and that was a turning point. Many times I heard a small voice in my head saying “this can’t be right” but I ignored it and the voice got softer and softer and disappeared.  Trusting my instincts has helped tremendously with doing proxy sessions and working with animals.  The more I trust myself, the more successful I am. Learning to trust myself has been a journey for me and one I am still on.”  Leah MacLeod
  • “Learning the repatterning process enabled me to learn to trust it and myself (something I had in very limited supply—witness the dependence on cookbooks and sewing patterns.)   I learned to trust especially as I started to see results with my clients even when it seemed to me that nothing ‘spectacular’ had happened in a session.”    Kathie Joblin
  • “My mentor Bobbi Martin spoke to my early concern about not being good enough. She said to set an intention to only attract clients that match my level.  After that I had no worry and it never happened!   I learned the material and became a good technician, confident that when I follow the process exactly I can’t make a mistake because I’m muscle checking.” Wendie Theus
  • “Everything I ever learned in my life helped shape me into a practitioner.  I’ve always been in the field of communication and have always had the confidence to know I can achieve what I want.  In the first hour of the first seminar, I knew.”  Michael Fischer
  • “I chose to be a practitioner almost immediately.  I had been to two sessions and a class and I got so excited that I went to more classes in New York and then just kept on going.  I had a degree in psychology and a master’s in early childhood education.  I was surprised at how well I had prepared for something I had never heard of!  It was just what I had been looking for, it offered all the pieces that nothing else offered in the same way. “  Lynn Morgan

2.  “Was/is there a specific skill, talent, or quality that you possess (or that you gained in the process) that helped transform you into a confident practitioner?”

  • “Now, many years later, I can see that transformation is going on all the time.  It’s either a slow evolutionary process, or sometimes it’s a ‘whack on the side of the head’ !  But it is inevitable. The work I do has shaped my thinking, perceptions and attitudes around the subject of transformation.”  Kathie Joblin
  • “Transformation is what I love most in life, whether it is mine or those whom I support.  Because I spend so much of my energy on my own transformation work, I bring lots of tools to support others.”  Sally Herr
  • “I would say that my specific quality/skill is the ability to hold a space of complete acceptance, love, and compassion for my clients.  This makes it easier to go deep with them and create profound shifts.”  Jennifer Foster
  • “My ability to create a sacred space and to “be with” the client rather than focusing on the books, so they have an experience of being gotten.”  Victoria Benoit
  • “My willingness is to transform, to be in the process, continually.  Transformation is on-going.” Elizabeth Tobin
  • “Intuition is one of the strongest things that has developed in my practice. I am able to feel in my body what is going on.  Even if the client is not aware, I would put it out and often they would become aware that it was the blocks that needed to be cleared.” Lynn Morgan
  • “I was fully present with the material, which then allowed me to become fully present with myself, with myself as Presence.”  Patti Towhill
  • “I seem to be a born confidant and spiritual cheerleader.  I practice “beginner’s mind” and remember that I do not and can not know what is best for another along with a commitment to the higher purpose in all experiences.”  Laura Frisbie
  • “I am very sensitive to Energy Constrictions. There are always at least one in every session, it is a given.  I do long sessions and sometimes there are three or four energy constriction releases; I’d say at least one or two per hour.”  Lindis-Chloe Guinness
  • “My skill, which I honed more and more with Repatterning, was connecting the dots for myself and others.  I think it was innate for me and became even more apparent as I did the work.”  Bobbie Martin
  • “I am detail oriented versus the more feeling oriented, which I think most practitioners are.  I can’t make a mistake because I follow the process exactly.”  Wendi Theus

“One can talk about being present, but it’s not a command performance. This was the most difficult thing for me to acquire.  I can’t even say how I learned to contain enough safety to simply BE with another except that I practiced (by offering dozens of sessions).  And I asked for help.

I know that rhythmic breathing is required as well as feeling my body in the chair, my feet on the floor.  I feel my attention diffused throughout my being rather than concentrated in my head.  My eyes feel soft and I can move my awareness into my heart.  From the heart space, I can fill the room with loving presence and effectively entrain with my client.

I have also learned the value of asking for help.  Before every session, I connect with ancestors and friends who are no longer in physical life but come readily into my awareness when asked.  I breathe their presence into my energy field.  This is deeply comforting and fills me with confidence that I can meet whatever challenges arise.  When a difficult moment comes, I slow down and consciously focus on my breath and the connection to spiritual support.  I do what it takes to be present because there is no other way I can hold a healing space for them.  As a result, I serve my highest good because I want to serve others.”   Tina Beneman

3.  “Is there a particular skill or quality that, in your opinion, is crucial for transforming one into a confident practitioner?”

  • “Being intuitively tuned into the client.”  Michael Fischer
  • “Not staring at books but engaging the client, going beyond the mechanical to a quantum leap of professional healing.”  Patti Towhill
  • “Aside from mastering basic technique, the most vital skill is the ability to be present.” Tina Beneman
  • “Comfort with mystery and paradox in general.”  Laura Frisbie
  • “If I had to name one quality, I would say trust—trust in oneself and trust in the repatterning process to take us where we need to go.”  Kathie Joblin
  • The most important quality is willingness to show up.”  Sally Herr
  • “I tell my students that practice, practice, practice does it.”  Bobbie Martin
  • “My ability to create a sacred space and to “be with” the client rather than focusing on the books, so they have an experience of being gotten.”  Victoria Benoit
  • “Being able to easily navigate the manuals and to bring clients successfully through the process, and also to truly hear what a client is saying beyond the words they are speaking.” Jennifer Foster
  • “Desire, commitment, and perseverance.”  Elizabeth Tobin
  • “Intuition”  Lynn Morgan
Laura Frisbie, Resonance Repatterning Practitioner
Laura Frisbie, Resonance Repatterning Practitioner

Laura Frisbie, M.Ed., http://www.beat-depression-naturally.com